40 Comments

This is SO good. Moments of snort-laughs (the grape jelly! I am always thinking about the apocalypse!), interspersed with moments of sweetness that made the corners of my eyes sting with tears. Thank you for it!

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Thank you!

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Oh yeah, and the goddamn batteries!!! {{{snort!}}}

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The more thought I gave this piece the more I realized how much time I’ve spent scrutinizing and judging people based on the contents of their shopping carts and by extension their grocery lists. Time for me to stop that nonsense.

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I always feel judged for the contents of my shopping cart. Way too much cereal.

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So true! Another good one to put in your new collection of essays or short-shorts

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Thank you!

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Wonderful! I love how you've turned the everyday into beautiful art.

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Thank you. Always looking for the magic in the ordinary!

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I love peanuts (and peanut butter) but if I buy mixed nuts, its the ones with no peanuts. Thanks for making the ordinary special

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Yup! The mixed nuts no peanuts!

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Ah so true about peanuts—that along with a hazelnut allergy makes for long dramatic pauses in the snack aisle trying to make sure the mix isn’t peanutty (it’s a word really) OR deadly!

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Legume browsing!

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Funny and so very poignant ❤️

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Thank you!

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Beautiful, funny, profound. Loved this. ❤️

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Thank you!

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So recognizable! Especially those damned batteries, lol

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Thank you!

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From now on I’m going to put more thought into my grocery lists.

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Hahahaha

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Truer words were never spoken/written about AAA and AA batteries.

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Hahahaha, yeah! Immodestly speaking, I laughed when I wrote that.

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This makes me snort-laugh all over again! You cracking yourself up over the perfect line!

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Whole Paycheck!

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Everyone thinks Whole Foods is too expensive, but it’s not. The supermarkets in New York City are more expensive and the food sucks.

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You reeled me in with this story… unexpectedly! Thanks, Sherman.

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Thanks!

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Uber Eats will deliver, but it doesn't sound appetizing. They might steal some macaroni. What should a poseur connoisseur do?

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Hasta la pasta, baby!

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Hahahaha

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Those dang pasta thieves!

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I love to grocery shop. It’s the only thing I do. Whole Foods has great toilet paper and it’s cheap. I love their organic omega 3 eggs and their prepared foods. I don’t cook. And I can walk there. I like organic fruit and slaw and delicious cod fish. I’m not going today. It’s cold and raining and I have plenty of food. Am going to Mexico and can eat chapelunes but don’t like them. I love your stories.😷💘🥶

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There was a Whole Foods across the street from my old office. The hot buffet was awesome.

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