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Imola's avatar

I am not making this up! I read this as a fly is buzzing around. Before I read your poem I was thinking of how to get rid of it. Now I'm having second thoughts. Thank you for a great poem!!

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Kathleen Brant's avatar

thoughtful and a reminder of the importance of every living thing in the cycle of nature

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Timmy Taes's avatar

Alexie, I know one story about the Spokane Indians. First, some background...

I'm part of a large group of hippies who grew up in the 1950s and 60s in Lincoln, Nebraska. When we graduated from high school, we headed west. Some of us ended up in California. My wife and I moved to Seattle, and a couple we knew well moved to the Spokane area.

The couple bought some property in the Huckleberry Mountains, built a cabin, and grew marijuana on a mountaintop while doing odd jobs in the area.

They met some hippies from Michigan, the Detroit area. This group built geodesic homes on what was called "Dome Lane" down on the flats near Spokane.

My wife and I went to visit our friends at their cabin in the Huckleberry Mountains. They introduced us to the Dome Lane folks. We had a good time.

And they told me this story...

Now, fair warning, this tale is not for the squeamish, politically correct, or folks who can't handle a story that doesn't comply with their prejudices. It is a true story.

One of the men in this group married a beautiful Spokane Indian. They were very happy together. The husband was good friends with his Spokane Indian in-laws.

One night, the husband and his in-laws were playing pool and drinking at a bar.

For some reason, the Indian in-laws knocked out the husband with their pool cues, threw his body on the pool table, and castrated him.

The husband went to the hospital and lived. The Indian in-laws were very contrite when they sobered up and apologized, but the husband was still missing his testicles.

I don't like my in-laws at all, but they haven't tried castrating me yet.

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Malcolm J McKinney's avatar

This is why I love Substack,

These great long raps.

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Malcolm J McKinney's avatar

A Tale of a Fly and an Eye

A fly

Flew in behind a

Lense by my nose

In front of my right eye

On it's first pass.

A thought arose,

How could I suppose

An event so obscure

Would cause even the fly

To wonder, as I,

Why it should occure.

Happen it did.

Why would I lie?

I was sure you

Would like to know

About such a thing.

And so I must essay to bring

It to your attention.

A tale of a fly and an eye,

I hope you don't mind.

Please excuse this

Idle intention

To amuse

By flying the "fly by eye" flight by.

From some far away galaxy 2024

I wrote this at 3pm after taking half a 200mg caffeine pill at work about 10am

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Weston Parker's avatar

That's a good poem, thanks

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

Thanks, Weston.

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Jean's avatar

Hi Sherman. Once again, you helped my morning funk. I’m laughing right now thinking how you do that so many times! When you started talking about dust and flies, I remembered a joke from the third grade which the class genius, Ronnie Lemon told. Our teacher, Mrs. Kirsch was standing but almost fell over laughing. The rest of us just sat there in silence because none of us understood it. When I went home that day, I told my mom Ronnie Lemon’s joke, and she laughed really hard too, but the good thing was, she explained it to me and it’s still one of my favorite jokes as an old lady.

Ronnie Lemon’s Joke

A little boy looks under his bed and he sees dust so he goes up to his mom and asks, mom, when we die do we turn to dust? And she said yes. And then he asked his mom, when we are born do we come from dust ? And she said yes. Well, there’s some under my bed and I don’t know if it’s coming or going!

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

Hahahaha. Good one, Ronnie!

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Renée  Roehl's avatar

Thank you for your (inadvertent?) ode to flies. 🪰 I love the flies! 🪰 Like mushrooms, they perform a value service to the earth.

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

Thanjs, Renée!

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Margaret Bacheler's avatar

I love when poetry discusses stars! Your poem took me back to e.e. cummings:

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

I saw more stars in the night sky

in my reservation youth

than I do now as a city Indian.

What was wild in me

as a child is only metaphor now.

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Malcolm J McKinney's avatar

Amen

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Linda Ruth's avatar

True....but I am still cheered by the occasional sighting of a butterfly.

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

I love butterflies, too. But I can't remember the last time I saw one in Seattle.

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Linda Ruth's avatar

Climate change has played a role, impacting breeding cycles, food availability, and overall habitat stress. 🦋

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Jean's avatar

Yes, and where we live, there are hardly any more around. It’s truly sad.

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Linda Ruth's avatar

Sadly, it is the same here.

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Timmy Taes's avatar

Flies spread disease. In the book and movie, the true story, "Into the Wild", the protagonist went into the wild of Alaska. He found a bus and lived in it. He shot a moose, but the meat went bad because of flies. The young man starved to death.

I don't think Alexie's ancestors liked flies.

As for space and constellations, it's a very cold and empty environment out there in Outer Space. Earth is a special place. Maybe humans are special, too. Maybe we'll blow each other up, or maybe just quit reproducing. Who knows? Space travel is impossible at the moment.

Maybe watch "The Fly", either movie version, to understand them.

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

You've made a sweeping and very inaccurate generalization about Native people's relationships with flies. Look up "Navajo Big Fly Mythology."

Also, "cold" is a sweeping and inaccurate generalization about space. On the next warm day, ask yourself why it's warm. Then realize there are something like 200 billion suns in the Milky Way. Hundreds of millions of planets are being warmed by those suns. Some of those suns are like our sun. Some of those planets are like Earth. There are hundreds of millions of planets that could possibly be inhabited by living things, including life forms that might resemble us. To get theological, I'd say that an infinite creator would create an infinity of life.

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Timmy Taes's avatar

The Aborigines co-exist with flies very well. Did the Spokane tribe? The Navajo are in a desert like the Aborigines. What are flies like in Eastern Washington?

You are assuming an infinite creator. My favorite theory about human life is that we are from Mars. Martian gravity is 38% of Earth's. This explains why we walk upright on two legs, our joints go to hell, and we have back troubles in Earth's higher gravity. It also explains our weak eyes. It also explains all of the ancient technologies that can't be recreated today.

But then, where did the Martians come from?

Outer Space is a vast, hostile place with a few oases in it. The distances are vast. The nearest star to our solar system is Alpha Centauri, 4.25 light years away. Humans can't live without gravity for long. Zero gravity is the limiting factor in space travel. An astronaut who has been in Zero gravity for a year on the ISS takes two years to get back to normal.

PS: My other favorite theory is that we are living in some alien's video game.

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

We were in horsedrawn carriages in 1900 and now we have vehicles on Mars. You don't think we're going to eventually figure out light-years space travel? As I've read in multiple places, "To learn how to travel at light speed, many many many people will have to be willing to die. And we'll have endless volunteers."

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Timmy Taes's avatar

Maybe you are right. I'm not so sure. Free energy tech has been quashed by the elites. Tesla figured it out long ago. That's a good rabbit hole to go down if you wish.

What I'm noticing is the dropping birthrate around the world. Once the birthrate drops to a certain tipping point, no one will be going anywhere.

I have two children in their late 40s. They have no children. What is the birthrate of the Spokane Tribe?

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

You walked into a trap. Of course, we Spokanes have beautiful stories about flies. There's an excellent story about a beautiful river filled with pure water. All the animals graciously share this water except for moose who selfishly drinks so much that he begins to lower the river. All the animals are afraid he'll drink all the water and ruin their worlds. But they're all afraid of moose because he's so big and powerful. Even the bears, wolves, amd cougars are afraid of moose. But then a little fly arrives and promises that he can drive away the moose. The other animals don't believe him. But fly begins to bite moose. Keeps biting him. As powerful as he is, moose cannot touch the fly. It is too small and quick. The fly bites and bites and finally drives the moose away and saves the river. Yes, even the small can defeat the large if they're smart and brave enough. Also, don't be selfish.

Would you like more stories from a tribe that you know zero about?

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Timmy Taes's avatar

PS: Alexie, have you ever been bitten by a horsefly? I'm sure you'd remember. I do. Those damn things are the spawn of Satan.

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

My first name is Sherman. My last name is Alexie. There are many Indians in Alaska whose last name is Alexie. I'm not related to them.

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Timmy Taes's avatar

Alexie, I'm from Nebraska. We call people we like by their last names. Sherman reminds me of Gen. William Tecumseh Sherman, who said, "The only good Indian is a dead Indian," and he followed through on that premise after the Civil War.

Why you are named Sherman is beyond me. I won't use that name.

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Timmy Taes's avatar

Alexie, I like your tribal stories. I wrote, "I don't think Alexie's ancestors liked flies." I didn't say I knew. Big difference.

I lived for 25 years on Puget Sound. Even had a Tshimshian (sp?) girlfriend. I know some of their stories, not those of the Spokane tribe.

Flies do drive moose nuts. That's why they hang out in ponds and lakes.

My girlfriend's grandmother lived to be 100. She was a full blooded Tsimshian. And I heard this story...

Outside of Juneau, Alaska, was a mountain of gold. The Swedes came and mined that mountain so full of tunnels that it eventually collapsed. The Chinese came to Juneau and opened laundries and opium dens, small businesses, saloons, etc. Some Chinese even mined the mountain of gold. The Chinese worked hard, and the Swedes became resentful.

The Tshimshian tribe stayed out of Juneau and the mines. They lived in the hills and on the coast around Juneau.

One night, the Swedes got together into a mob. They rounded up all the Chinese and put them on a leaky barge in the harbor.

The next morning, on the outgoing tide, the Chinese on their leaky barge were sent out to sea. They were never seen again.

The Tshimshian watched all this happen from the hills above.

I'm not sure what they thought of it all.

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Ryn's avatar

Thank you for telling it like it is in a way that can be heard.

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Katelon's avatar

I love this. I'm very generous with most insects, even catching spiders to let them go outside and scorpions. But somehow flies have always escaped my caring and assistance. This poem shifts my perspective and I thank you!

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

Thanks, Katelon. I'm sorry to bum you out but house spiders are called house spiders because they live in houses. That's their natural environment. So it's not automatically true that a house spider can survive outside. I'd suggest, if you wish to remove spiders from your immediate vicinity, that you relocate them to your basement or attic or other less human-traveled parts of your house.

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Katelon's avatar

Thanks. So are you saying that's true of scorpions, too ?

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

You can set scorpions on fire in they're in your house! Ha!

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Annie Gottlieb's avatar

Whenever I killed a cockroach (hey, it's NYC) I used to silently say, as a kind of prayer, "As flies to wanton boys are we to th'gods,/ They kill us for their sport" (Shakespeare).

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

Ah, yes, a good ceremony, Annie.

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Kathy Ortiz's avatar

Absolutely. We must see ourselves as tiny as we really are to even conceive of the divine.

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Jan Chaffin's avatar

That s&*t is fly!

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

Hahahahahaha

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Jan Chaffin's avatar

Transcendent!

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Sherman Alexie's avatar

Thank you!

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