I too am sooo afraid of fire. What is it about Indian Country that we are impacted by fire, drownings and car wrecks. In the early 1980's (Tacoma) I was aked by my best friend to take my son to a friends house, where the matriarch was babysitting a bunch of kids under the age of 10, so everybody could go party elsewhere. My son was sick so I said "no I can't tonight". Got a call at 6 am notifying me that the house burnt down and 8 children died in that fire that was started by kids playing with matches. All native children -- so tragic, yet not unusual. So I'm super afraid of fires (I won't have a wood stove) and so many lost in car wrecks that I am a paranoid driver. So sorry for your loss, we never get over them or stop thinking about those we have lost.
Your sadness and fear are palpable in the poem. I think there is a primal attraction to stare into the the flames of a small, controlled fire. It's when control is lost that attraction turns to fear and horror always remembered.
Scars from the loss of family can last a lifetime and longer. Sorrow for your loss is not enough.
I have been burned by heat, but rarely by fire. We have a wood burning heat stove with a clear window in the door. I can stare at the flames and pretend to become one with my ancient ancestors. Of course "pretend" is the operative word. Please have the best Christmas you can have with your family and friends.
I worked part time this year at outdoor street events grilling Japanese yakitori chicken. All day long the flames will pop out and bite my hands once in a while. But they never get the best of me and it's satisfying that the customers absolutely love the chicken.
I am so sorry you lost your sister in the house fire, Sherman. No wonder why you’re afraid of fire. As a child my family and I went through two house fires, one only partially burned our home in Chelan and later the other in Montana burned to the ground, every room but mine. 😳 No one was killed or injured but after the second fire my mother was never the same again because we lost everything. She lost all the pictures and mementoes of her childhood and young adulthood, and all her cherished books.
Yes, but no one was killed, unlike your family’s fire tragedy, Sherman. Losing a sister to a house fire is much worse. I don’t think that’s something anyone ever stops grieving. Hugs for you.
You take me back to Prometheus: the terror and the gift. I rely on heroes in _Who by Fire: a novel_: Folks who've done incredible things to save others from fire. Have my own obsession with fire. We need it and know that tragic losses come with it. From my heart to yours for your sister, Sherman. No way to heal from that loss. xo ~Mary
reference to a burning house in a very important speech that I covered - “If your child was in a burning house, and you knew that there was very little chance that you could save them, would you not try? Would you not try?” - Dane Wigington on March 28, 2015 https://youtu.be/dibNc-pT2sQ?t=1427
It reminded me of my neighbor’s house burning completely to the ground when I was a kid. A family of four, nobody was home. Police questioned the father because the authorities and many people in the community thought he did it on purpose for insurance money. They were poor. Soon after the fire, he took his life in the woods across from my childhood home.
It was crazy. Seeing the flames, witnessing the destruction. I saw the PD pull him out of the woods, too. His son was around six or seven at the time. He didn't understand. He would ride his bike alone around the neighborhood and randomly start talking stoically to me about his dad. Watching that kid mature too soon and fall into the wrong crowd was also a tragedy.
Amazing! I thought I was alone in my fears--planes, elevators, ships and boats etc. It makes traveling hard, doesn't it? The only mode of transit I really enjoy is trains. When I was in college I took the train from Spokane to Boston 16 times, 68+ hours one way.
I think I mentioned to you that I got to visit with him at the All year reunion. He didn't look great but he totally had that Fred twinkle in the eye still. Such a huge loss.
Death is never easy but this time of year comes in swinging like it’s proud of itself. Whether your mood is low or high, you, me, everyone - we are alive right now. Much good to you and your family.
I share your fear of fire but for no remembered reason. It is magnificent and unrelenting and beautiful, dancing and demonic. I have seen faces and forms in the flames as if beckoning us to join their dance. I have a fireplace that I have never used because I am so afraid. Fire swallows and engulfs us and is nonnegotiable. It always wins. I am so sorry for the loss of your sister in this way and understand that it will always haunt you. But fire warms the body and lights our way on the dark path too so there is good, on the other side of terror.
I too am sooo afraid of fire. What is it about Indian Country that we are impacted by fire, drownings and car wrecks. In the early 1980's (Tacoma) I was aked by my best friend to take my son to a friends house, where the matriarch was babysitting a bunch of kids under the age of 10, so everybody could go party elsewhere. My son was sick so I said "no I can't tonight". Got a call at 6 am notifying me that the house burnt down and 8 children died in that fire that was started by kids playing with matches. All native children -- so tragic, yet not unusual. So I'm super afraid of fires (I won't have a wood stove) and so many lost in car wrecks that I am a paranoid driver. So sorry for your loss, we never get over them or stop thinking about those we have lost.
Thank you. I would guess that these kind of tragedies have just as much to do with economic class as they do about race.
Your sadness and fear are palpable in the poem. I think there is a primal attraction to stare into the the flames of a small, controlled fire. It's when control is lost that attraction turns to fear and horror always remembered.
Scars from the loss of family can last a lifetime and longer. Sorrow for your loss is not enough.
I have been burned by heat, but rarely by fire. We have a wood burning heat stove with a clear window in the door. I can stare at the flames and pretend to become one with my ancient ancestors. Of course "pretend" is the operative word. Please have the best Christmas you can have with your family and friends.
Lovely images. Thank you, Steve.
I worked part time this year at outdoor street events grilling Japanese yakitori chicken. All day long the flames will pop out and bite my hands once in a while. But they never get the best of me and it's satisfying that the customers absolutely love the chicken.
Sounds great! I’m grateful for the food folks who aren’t afraid of fire!
OMG! Sending you a hug!
Thank you, Reena.
I am so sorry you lost your sister in the house fire, Sherman. No wonder why you’re afraid of fire. As a child my family and I went through two house fires, one only partially burned our home in Chelan and later the other in Montana burned to the ground, every room but mine. 😳 No one was killed or injured but after the second fire my mother was never the same again because we lost everything. She lost all the pictures and mementoes of her childhood and young adulthood, and all her cherished books.
Two fire tragedies in your family. Damn.
Yes, but no one was killed, unlike your family’s fire tragedy, Sherman. Losing a sister to a house fire is much worse. I don’t think that’s something anyone ever stops grieving. Hugs for you.
You take me back to Prometheus: the terror and the gift. I rely on heroes in _Who by Fire: a novel_: Folks who've done incredible things to save others from fire. Have my own obsession with fire. We need it and know that tragic losses come with it. From my heart to yours for your sister, Sherman. No way to heal from that loss. xo ~Mary
40 years later and I still grieve.
Heart to heart. I rarely share this, Sherman. Maybe you're the one person who could handle it—just so you know: not many can: https://www.maryltabor.com/2019/07/benjamin-hammerschlag-in-my-heart.html xo ~Mary
reference to a burning house in a very important speech that I covered - “If your child was in a burning house, and you knew that there was very little chance that you could save them, would you not try? Would you not try?” - Dane Wigington on March 28, 2015 https://youtu.be/dibNc-pT2sQ?t=1427
my Chapter 1 reporting of this speech https://youtu.be/lSgyvEIKljE
It reminded me of my neighbor’s house burning completely to the ground when I was a kid. A family of four, nobody was home. Police questioned the father because the authorities and many people in the community thought he did it on purpose for insurance money. They were poor. Soon after the fire, he took his life in the woods across from my childhood home.
Damn, damn, damn. That is a tragedy.
I just realized—there’s a fictional story in there somewhere.
It was crazy. Seeing the flames, witnessing the destruction. I saw the PD pull him out of the woods, too. His son was around six or seven at the time. He didn't understand. He would ride his bike alone around the neighborhood and randomly start talking stoically to me about his dad. Watching that kid mature too soon and fall into the wrong crowd was also a tragedy.
That kid would've needed a massive support system ro get him through.
Also made me think of Fire and Ice by Robert Frost. And To Build a Fire, by London.
J. London crossed my mind, too.
Wow. Again--you pack a strong punch with very little externally. Fire 🔥 🔥🔥🔥🔥
Thank you, Michael.
Amazing! I thought I was alone in my fears--planes, elevators, ships and boats etc. It makes traveling hard, doesn't it? The only mode of transit I really enjoy is trains. When I was in college I took the train from Spokane to Boston 16 times, 68+ hours one way.
Wow!!! Impressive! I took Amtrak across the country from Ca to NY probably half a dozen times in my twenties. Incredible.
Guess you are not going to switch the tone of your work for the holidays? Thank you.
My neighbor who I had been helping due to his poor health killed himself last weekend and all I can think about is death. His, mine, everyone’s.
I am afraid of death.
Hope you don’t mind if I write my own poems inspired by your work?
This incantation seems like one of my tools to heal with just now.
I am afraid of death.
Your poems open me to more of myself and often give me a way out or in - to places which might have stayed hidden.
Hope your holidays are as good as you want them to be.
Peace.
I’m sorry to hear that about your neighbor ❤️
My favorite high school teacher died this week. He was vastly important to me so my mood is low.
I think I mentioned to you that I got to visit with him at the All year reunion. He didn't look great but he totally had that Fred twinkle in the eye still. Such a huge loss.
Mmm. Sorry to hear that. Hit me in the gut cause it made me think of my old high school English teacher who changed my life
Death is never easy but this time of year comes in swinging like it’s proud of itself. Whether your mood is low or high, you, me, everyone - we are alive right now. Much good to you and your family.
🔥❤️
Sherman, as always, thank you.
🔥
Thank you, Dick!
I share your fear of fire but for no remembered reason. It is magnificent and unrelenting and beautiful, dancing and demonic. I have seen faces and forms in the flames as if beckoning us to join their dance. I have a fireplace that I have never used because I am so afraid. Fire swallows and engulfs us and is nonnegotiable. It always wins. I am so sorry for the loss of your sister in this way and understand that it will always haunt you. But fire warms the body and lights our way on the dark path too so there is good, on the other side of terror.
Beautiful 😻
I'm afraid of water, too—lakes, rivers, oceans. And flying. And heights. Seems like the earth is the only safe element for me.
A gripping poem, Sherman. Thank you for sharing it.
Thank you, Corey,