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Shemaiah Gonzalez's avatar

This poem is hard for me because yes. But rum and coke. And when he shook the ice in glass, you knew he was ready for other. A Pavlovian gesture I still respond to. Sends shivers up my shine. Did he love me? I too, think he did and he did not know how to let me know.

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Jeanette Boyer's avatar

Having grown up with an alcoholic father who behaved similarly, I preferred the first version, as it went without saying that there were too many beers and sometimes he passed out. Call me a minimalist, but I found the first version more impactful. I can see where others would like the additional details better.

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